Sunday, 12 July 2009

Alone in the dark...

(by Daniel Tee)

It was my dream as a kid to have my very own cinema to use whenever I liked. This dream has manifested since a mega multi-level multiplex opened in the city centre. The out-of-town cinemas have become as empty as tennis courts in the rain. The benefits of going to the less-frequented movie machines are numerous. One: there's often absolutely no one there. Two: parking is never an issue. Three: there's nobody to laugh at you if you start crying at the sad bits.

There's something extremely eerie about an empty place at night. Perfect for watching a horror film, with moments of tension punctuated only by faint explosion-booms from the screen next door. One time, while watching 'Aliens VS Predator: Requiem' (someone had to watch it..), a couple of kids came in the fire escape and started making alien sounds in the exit corridor. They must have felt quite pleased with their xeno-foolery. Little did they know I was sneaking past the screen with my arsenal of predator noises and unusually large teeth brandished. The speed at which they exited the building made me realise that even the simplist of real-life frights outshone anything offered by the movie.

It's strange how such a large room can become very much like your own living room when there's no one else there. While watching 'Next' starring the immortal Nick Cage, a guy shuffled into the back row with his girlfriend. They didn't notice me initially, so it was a little awkward when they started desperately fondling each other. Just as I heard an unzipping sound, the guy looked up and noticed me, exclaiming, "For God's sake, not again!" I'm not sure of the subtext of the exclamation, but I can speculate that they were hoping for slightly more ideal 'public-place privacy'. I guess they had to put up with actually watching the movie they'd paid to see, which thankfully turned out to be an all right Cage caper.

I would recommend going to the cinema on your own as I do, but I've decided you're not allowed to. If you were there too, like the alien kids and the young couple, I won't be alone. So stay away from neglected cinemas. They're all mine! :)

No comments:

Post a Comment